We're all capitalists here, I suspect - I mean does anyone in this message thread - a single person - advocate for state ownership of all means of production and then centralised controlled distribution of goods and services? I didn't think so. I think the term you're looking for is laissez-faire capitalists, of which there could be a few. Most people support some degree of regulatory control.
We should stop with "you're either an X or a Y". That might be true on TV or on Twitter. It is not true in real life.
Read the first line, thought "How could they be so wrong?".
Then read the second line, thought "Oh... you got me, that was a funny joke".
And now thinking "Oh... maybe they're serious, which would make this an hilarious case of 'do what I (maybe?) say in real life, not what I do on TV, Twitter, or HN' "
Sorry, you only yet to be a capitalist if you actually own the means of production. Otherwise you're just a wage slave with Stockholm Syndrome. And yeah, there is at least one person in this thread that unambiguously supports state ownership of production. If that isn't you you get to rationalize the consumption of non-renewable resources in a finite system for production of utterly fatuous bullshit like the fitbit-for-your-dong (I can't be assed to look it up).
We should stop with "you're either an X or a Y". That might be true on TV or on Twitter. It is not true in real life.