I know and knew dozens of women in computer science degrees, this did not ever happen to many of them. We’re not harsh or unwelcoming to women here, yet the women stay away.
I think people mix "unwelcoming environment" and "X out of Y of the group Z have been subjected to A" questionnaires a bit too much. Maybe the women you know/knew had one or two uncomfortable encounters, but don't project that to judge the entire workplace, and therefore wouldn't mention it even if you ask.
As an anecdotal example, A coworker made some very uncomfortable racist remarks regularly to me after I (mistakenly) told him about my ethnic background. I left that job and the guy who took my position (middle-eastern) also experienced same thing already in his first two-weeks. We would both not consider the workplace (or the group) an unwelcoming environment, but would probably answer "yes" to the questionnaire asking of workplace discrimination.
It's certainly not evenly distributed. I moved from a undergraduate school with tons of stories like this to a graduate school with very few, and, as far as I know, the undergraduate side was not problematic either.
You also may not have heard everyone's stories. I also have known probably orders of magnitude more women in CS than would necessarily be comfortable sharing unpleasant stories of harassment and discrimination with me. I think it's remarkable, of the women I've known fairly well, how many had stories like this (the civil eng one was really out there, to be clear).
Isn’t that an example of survivorship bias? The women that any of us meet (including those of us who see one in the mirror each morning) in software engineering are necessarily the set which have not found their environments so bad that they left.
Your comment is anecdotal. If that is the case, then that's great, keep up the good work, be an example to others. But if it's anecdotal, it doesn't deny the issues elsewhere.
These kind of "Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence" arguments in social-justice topics constitute a Kafka-esque trap from which the accused cannot argue their case any further in a reasonable manner.
